What Quarantine 2020 Has Taught Me
We can all agree that this year has been one for the BOOKS! Like, seriously…
It has been the most self-reflected and emotional past few months that I’ve had in a long time. Let me just explain… when you’ve had months to sit at home and do a lot of self-evaluations on yourself. You really start to learn things, and not just about me but about others. One thing about me is that I’m a believer about keeping my energy and peace at the most highest level at all times. No one can make me believe that they’re worth me feeling miserable, uncomfortable, or unloved. I’ve learned how to handle conflicts and how I view friendships. There has been emotional stress due to our black brother and sisters being killed by police brutality. It has been a very hard time for me to come to terms and a fear of my husband & my children going out into this world. That in a split second it could be the worst day of my family’s life. If this is something you don’t have to worry about, consider yourself lucky.
I have been taking meaningful steps to create a space where I feel comfortable. Rather it’s online on my personal social media or in person. I have the power to narrate my own story and understanding that I have no control on what role I play in someone else’s life story. It’s time that I start seeing it for what it is. I understand it being an uncomfortable topic to speak about, but it’s time to start speaking and seeing how YOU can help fight racial injustice. If you are silent at this point in time, just know that it speaks volume. It’s not a blacks vs white thing, it’s a humanity vs systemic racism, oppression, and pure evil.
It’s been like a scab being picked at over and over. One point it’s healing and then BAM, it’s scraped off and exposed and bleeding again. That’s how it was for me learning about Amaud Avery, then Breonna Taylor, then George Floyd, and recently Elijah McClain. We are having conversations with our soon to be 11 year old about, jogging with a hoodie on while black (Amaud), sleeping while black (Breonna), and being choked to death by police (George). There’s a constant fear that I will always keep with me being black, having a black husband and children. Here’s what we can do:
Black Lives Matter: https://blacklivesmatter.com/whatmatters/
God has been my shelter during all of this, and of course my family. He has been manifesting so many blessings around me and I’m just so thankful. I can definitely say that in quarantine my relationship with God has grew. I really wanted to write to you, whoever reading this, that it’s perfectly fine to demand your peace and energy with those that doesn’t bring the same in your life. You have been created in the image of God and you are loved, appreciated, and wonderful. I wish nothing but the best for you!